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Julia LeFrancois Ӱԭ23 M.A., who recently accepted her masterӰԭs degree in community psychology, encourages her fellow graduates to reflect, connect with others, and share their stories.
May 17, 2023
I talk a lot about using oneӰԭs voice, and this may be the first time IӰԭve gotten to use my own voice in this way. It feels like a big deal. It feels important, and IӰԭm thankful. I know YOUӰԭVE all been waiting for this day. And by waiting, I mean stressing about deadlines, needing naps, and maybe crying a little? I promise this wonӰԭt be stressful or nap inducing. No promises on the tears, though ItӰԭs graduation...a lot emotions...if you need to cry...go on with your bad self.
IӰԭd like to start out by honoring the unceded lands of indigenous and first nations on which we are celebrating. I am a Latina with Native-American ancestry, and this is something that speaks to who I am. I appreciate that we, as a community, have started acknowledging this in our celebrations. You might have heard a land acknowledgement or two, and I want to point out that while itӰԭs a step forward in collective healing, it really only becomes meaningful if we do the work that itӰԭs asking. Me standing up here and honoring Pequonnock, Paugusset, and Schaghticoke lands is only genuine if I ask you all to do some work. Let this acknowledgement be meaningful to you.
As a call to action, I ask each of you to do a little reading later today. Just one more homework assignment. One more! After youӰԭve hugged loved ones and taken some beautiful photos and celebrated a little bit, take a few minutes to read the history of the rightful caretakers of this land.
My name is Julia. IӰԭm a storyteller. For those who know me, you know itӰԭs one of the first pieces of my identity that I disclose when connecting with folks. That and probably something synonymous with smashing the patriarchy. I am many other things. I am disabled. I am a woman. I am a scholar and a change-maker. I am a friend and a survivor. IӰԭm a cozy-gamer and a lover of a good cup of tea. In fact, IӰԭve probably forced you to sit through whole presentations of my Sims 4 builds at one time or another in the last two years, and for that I say...youӰԭre welcome.
But today, IӰԭd like to be a storyteller, and share a story with which I think you can all connect. ItӰԭs about a child who grew into an adult many times over throughout their life. They experienced joy and trauma. They made mistakes and incredible decisions that led to success. They questioned themselves Ӱԭ often Ӱԭ and wondered what their life would look like in the future. Would they become a makeup artist for the stars? Would they show up for that Clipper Girls audition they got senior year? Would they write the next epic romance novel from their English cottage nestled away in the countryside? Would they walk away from a decade-long career and go back to school in their thirties?
They were good at some things and bad at others, and they knew the feeling of loss more than they wished they had. Loss of loved ones. Loss of direction. Loss of self. They found themselves at, although very cliché, and also very real and human, a crossroads. You know the one. The one where you can go right or left. Take the blue pill or red pill? You get it.
One way brought them to a decent place. Full of familiar choices and options. It wasnӰԭt horrible or amazing. It was nice. Safe. Easy to walk straight on through. It was a place that said, Ӱԭwelcome,Ӱԭ and though a few corners looked a little sketchy, it wasnӰԭt anything they couldnӰԭt handle. The other way was way more of a mystery. For some reason, the path was difficult to see ahead. It could have been blocks in the road or some other navigational error. But for whatever reason, the assurance and safety, like on the right, was lacking. What they could see were glimpses of signs. One said, ӰԭEnter here: but only if youӰԭre brave.Ӱԭ Another said, ӰԭDonӰԭt go in. Too many unknowns.Ӱԭ
At one point, they thought they saw a sign that said, ӰԭCome on in! The waterӰԭs fine! Sometimes.Ӱԭ A few signs, small and a little hidden beneath others, said words such as, Ӱԭchange,Ӱԭ Ӱԭdiscovery,Ӱԭ Ӱԭmagic,Ӱԭ and ӰԭtruthӰԭ with fine print that warned the traveler of fear, hardship, and work. A lot of work. There were lot of signs, but not a lot of windows to see what it all looked like.
At this point in the story, you could totally go right. A lot of people go right. ItӰԭs absolutely okay, valid, and celebrated to go right. But this is my story, and I think you know which way weӰԭre gonna go. So...the nondescript traveler hesitantly goes left. ItӰԭs just as intimidating and exhausting as they imagined. They even turned around a few times to try to go back the way they came. But it was too late. Their path was theirs and even if where they ended up looked exactly like that initial road on the right, or if it became something spectacular and unexpected, they still went left. They did that. Spoiler alert: we did that. We did the scary thing. WeӰԭre still doing the scary thing.
This university has uniquely affected each graduate in a way that is personal to each of us, but we share the common thread of growth and scholarship. For me, this thread was bright and colorful. It connected me to others and grounded me in strength when life got hard. When life threw illness or depression, the University was there. It was there offering reprieve through events and celebrations. It was there in emails or remembrance from Dean Rowe-Allen and other campus leaders, honoring diverse holidays or the many tragedies that struck our campus and, collectively, our hearts. It was there every time I reached out to professors and received all the support I needed Ӱԭ and then some.
We all have that next chapter of our story in a draft somewhere, waiting to be told...waiting to be written...waiting to be revised, edited, and written again. But I can tell by all of your faces that youӰԭll probably go left a few more times. Remember this feeling.
In my story, the traveler was a five-foot tall millennial with bright red hair who lives for rocking all the institutionally oppressed boats and, basically, just shaking things up. Who was your traveler? What did they look like? How did they feel? What was their experience in their bodies and minds? What are their dreams and fears? And what do they live for? Whoever they were today (because we are nothing if not fluid and ever-changing), IӰԭd like to give them a few more spoilers. A few cheats Ӱԭ if you will Ӱԭ for getting through the next chapters of their story.
Find your communities. Find them, trust them, and share the main-character moments equally. Rest. Because, in the words of Tricia Hersey, Ӱԭrest is resistance.Ӱԭ Set boundaries, and practice asking for help. Say ӰԭNo!Ӱԭ You can do it, I promise. Say ӰԭyesӰԭ OR Ӱԭno,Ӱԭ and then change your mind. Listen when it is your time to listen, amplify voices who deserve amplification, take accountability for your mistakes, and say youӰԭre sorry. Have compassion for yourself and others when things donӰԭt go as planned.
Share your stories, because they are worthy of being told. And take whatever road you want. Right, left, up, down. Or some other direction that we havenӰԭt discovered yet. Take it. YouӰԭve got this. There will always be more roadsӰԭor doors, or windows, or whatever analogy feels good. And guess what? You have your communities. You have this community.
From here on out, we are all Chargers for life. So, when that navigational decision gets hard Ӱԭ because it will Ӱԭ when life takes more than youӰԭve given, or when you start to believe that voice that says you canӰԭt do it or that youӰԭre not enough, remember that you have an entire community of mentors and scholars who know that you can and who you are. They know what itӰԭs like, and they will inevitably be proud of you. Reach out to them. Connect with them. Like one of their posts on whatever social media takes over TikTok whenever it gets banned.
The point is...youӰԭve got people. And when youӰԭve got a story to tell...look me up. Because IӰԭd love to hear it. Truly...Congratulations, everyone!
Julia LeFrancois Ӱԭ23 M.A., a new graduate of the UniversityӰԭs graduate program in community psychology, was a finalist to serve as a student speaker at Commencement. The content above is based on the speech she delivered as part of the competitive process to select the student Commencement speakers.
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